Welcome To The Winter

I's winter time...time for more drinking.

How much more damn rain is needed before there is no more drought? I ALWAYS have water when I turn on my faucet.

As my brother would say, "It's ball-shrinking cold out!" So I keep a hand warmer in my underwear so mine can hang like a St. Bernard's sack.

Talking during sex? Where is the fine line from just sex talk, to a full on conversation?

Does Sylverster Stallone scream whenever he takes a shit?

If Stephen Hawking is so damn smart, why doesn't he fix himself? Or at least, fix Muhamed Ali?

Dudes always make up some kind of song when they try to hit up on women.

Women comedians are more perverted than men comedians...always talking about how small dudes dicks are. They sound like gun-control advocates.